Be True To You
There have been many different studies based on the life regrets of dying people. Over and over again, however, no matter the study, there is one regret that is consistently near or at the top of each list, and that is: “I wish I would have lived a life true to myself, and not the life expected of me by others.”
This article then, is simply an encouragement and plan for you to chase YOUR dreams, and live YOUR purpose and vision, so that you may reach YOUR destiny.
For you to live true to you, it is absolutely essential to cultivate the biggest factor in living a life of no regrets; and that is…
I have learned that the environment you CHOOSE to place yourself in is the single biggest factor in whether or not you will accomplish the dreams and goals you have for your life.
Your environment is the circle of people that you choose to spend the most time with. Essentially, your environment is your INNER CIRCLE of family and friends.
For you to live true to yourself, it is essential that your inner circle be comprised of people that share the same values and beliefs as you. When those in your inner circle share the same values and beliefs, they will understand YOU. They will understand your goals and dreams. As a result, they will lift you up and encourage you, instead of distracting you or tearing you down.
Your Inner Circle
Here are some thoughts on selecting and evaluating your inner circle:
- The bigger your dreams, the smaller your circle. Let’s get this out of the way right now: if you have HUGE dreams, I guarantee you will need to immediately remove some people from your inner circle. Why? Because when you have huge dreams, fewer people will be accepting and understanding of those dreams. You will make people uncomfortable. However, when you have mediocre dreams, you don’t have to be as selective because most people can accept and welcome mediocrity much easier than they can excellence or greatness. When people chase excellence, mediocre people get scared and intimidated, and respond by tearing you down. If you have heard people say, “You can’t do that” or “That’s impossible”, please, do yourself a favour and begin to remove those people from your inner circle. Today. I have heard it said that sheep flock together, while a lion walks alone. Be very selective!
- Have a common GOAL and VISION. Just like how a championship level sports team will be made of people who share the same goal and vision, your inner circle needs to be modelled the same way. As a teacher, nothing discourages me more than watching a student with ‘A-Level’ aspirations allow a peer with ‘D-level’ aspirations into their inner circle. Why? Because PEOPLE GENERALLY FALL TO THE LOWEST LEVEL OF EXPECTATIONS ALLOWED BY THEIR ENVIRONMENT. That means the student with ‘D-level’ aspirations will drag the ‘A-student’ to their level, instead of the other way. Sadly, in time, the ‘A-student’ will no longer resemble a person with high aspirations. Instead, they will begin to be late, make excuses, do just enough to get by, and hide from challenges – the student with high aspirations will no longer be distinguishable from the lower level. It’s a sad story.
- Never allow ‘outer circle’ people to creep into your inner circle. In the example above, where a student with ‘A-level’ aspirations was dragged down to the lowest level of their environment; there is a simple solution to avoid the pitfalls of a mediocre environment: STOP SPENDING SO MUCH TIME WITH THAT PERSON!! If you are unable to completely cut a ‘D-level’ person out of your life, because they are a close family member or life-long friend, simply begin the process of moving them into your outer circle. Slowly but surely, begin to spend less and less time with that person, until their expectations of you are no longer significant. They may say that you are dreaming too big or working too hard, but it wont matter because they will be out of your inner circle. Instead, those in your circle will be encouraging you to keep working and chasing your dreams.
Evaluate your inner circle immediately. If you have a gut feeling that someone shouldn’t be there, that’s an excellent sign that they shouldn’t, and you should begin the process of removing them right away.
You might be thinking to yourself, “What if I hurt their feelings?” I say back to that, WHAT IF YOU MISS YOUR DESTINY? Is it worth it? Well according to study after study, living for others is not worth the price. I challenge you, don’t live a life of regret. Stop living for others and begin living a life true to you. It may hurt today, but I promise, you will be celebrating tomorrow.
“Life’s too short to spend it trying to keep others happy. You can’t please everyone. To fulfill your destiny, stay true to your heart.”
- Be sure to follow me on INSTAGRAM. Each day I will post an inspiring message…a thought for the day…to help push you towards success.
- Be sure to read my other leadership posts. Check back every Sunday for the next article that will challenge you and prepare you for a life of impact and success.
- My book, “Seeds of Excellence for Teens: 24 Life Principles For Those Who Want to Stand Out From The Crowd“, is available on Amazon.